How to End a Relationship is not a question that people look forward to asking.

Everyone hopes that they will find a relationship that will last, but if you’re stuck in an unhealthy or troubled relationship that isn’t going to improve, then you might be better off breaking up and starting again with someone new. Ending a relationship, long term or not, is never fun, and it’s never easy, but there are a few things that you can do to make it a bit less painful.

Before we move on to the list, it’s a good idea to make sure that you really are in an unhealthy or troubled relationship. If you are, give some thought to trying to save the relationship. If you still feel that breaking up is the only solution, here are some tips to keep in mind.

 

1. It’s usually best to end it in person.

It’s tempting to just send someone a text saying, “Hi there . . . we are through”, but it’s probably not the best way to go about it. If you ever had strong feelings for this person, it’s better to let them know face to face. It helps to really make it clear that it’s over, both for them and for you too.

2. Be honest.

This means being honest with them and with yourself. Make sure you know why you are ending the relationship, and if possible, try and get them to understand too. If all you can come up with is “I used to like them, but I just don’t feel that way anymore” then that’s fine. You can’t change the way you feel. If you know in your own mind the reason why the relationship should end, then you will be a lot more confident that you’re doing the right thing. 

3. Understand that they might feel upset.

Breaking up with your boyfriend or girlfriend is unpleasant, and having someone break up with you is even more unpleasant! Try and be patient if they get emotional, but also remember that you don’t need to put up with them being petty or insulting. The relationship didn’t work. You are moving on. Then should too.  

4. Remember: you are doing the right thing.

If you know that your relationship isn’t going to work, then it needs to end. There is no other way around it, even though sometimes we might wish there was. If you stay with you partner when they aren’t right for you, all you are doing is delaying the inevitable. The best thing for each of you is to break up, so that you can both find love and happiness with new people.

5. Do it straight away.

If you know that you are going to end the relationship, do it sooner rather than later. It is sometimes tempting to say “Well, it’s their birthday next weekend, I will break up with them after that”, but it’s not a good idea to think about it that way. The longer that you let the relationship drag on for, the more unpleasant the break up will be. Get it over and done with, so that you can both move on with your lives.

Only once you are sure that the relationship really is over can you start looking for a New Relationship.